G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra [TS]

Distributor: Paramount
Cast: Channing Tatum, Dennis Quaid, Sienna Miller, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Jonathan Pryce, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Christopher Eccleston
Director: Stephen Sommers
Screenwriters: Stuart Beattie and David Elliot & Paul Lovett
Producers: Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Bob Ducsay and Stephen Sommers
Genre: Action
Rating: PG-13 for strong sequences of action violence and mayhem throughout.
Running Time: 120 min.
Release Date: August 7, 2009
G.I. Joe’s plot could not be more painfully generic. A weapons company develops a new kind of nanotechnology with the capability of destroying an entire city. The bad guys want to take control of said technology and it’s up to the good guys—an elite teams of soldiers known as G.I. Joes—to stop them. Yawn. The lame plot would almost be forgivable if the pyrotechnics it supported were exciting. Unfortunately, the action scenes are painfully dull and composed of some excruciatingly mediocre special effects. G.I. Joe often feels like a 14 year old boy recorded parts of a videogame and pawned it off to Summers and Co. as cinema. And when the bad guys finally do wield the power of the destructive technology, the result is a sequence that shamelessly caters to the same crowd that thought changing French Fries to “Freedom Fries” was a great way to show our disdain for France.

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